Since racing has come to a stand still, we need to fill in the gap with something. How about a few laughs. Tag! You're it. Add your laughs.

I actually had this happen to me. It wasn't funny though.

Same deal. When I worked for Rutgers University Physics department one of my PhD bosses came and asked me to see if I could figure out why is car made a thumping sound when he turned the corner and stopped. He said it went side to side when he turned. So I took it for a ride and sure enough it did what he said it was doing.   When I got backed and opened the trunk there it was , a six ounce coke bottle rolling from side to side.  Same guy a few months later leaves him lights on one rainy mornin. I asked him for his keys so I could turn them out for him. What does he do, he goes to the blackboard and start to figure out how long the battery will last and if he could make it to lunch time. I told him it would be dead by then and don't ask me to jumpstart it for him later. Yes it was dead and no I didn't jump it for him, he didn't want to admit I was right. Go figur.

The other day I was in the local auto part store. A lady comes in and asks for a seven ten cap.
We all looked at each other and said
“What’s a seven ten cap?”
She said “You know, it’s right on the engine. Mine got lost somehow and I need a new one.”
“What kind of a car is it on?” they asked.
Now I’m thinking maybe an old Datsun Seven Ten.
“No” she said “it’s a Buick.”
“OK lady, how big is it?”
She makes a circle with her hands about 3 1/2 inches in diameter.
“What does it do?,” we asked.
“I don’t know, but it’s always been there.” she said
One of us gave her a note pad and asked her if she could draw a picture of it.
So she makes a circle about 3 1/2 inches in diameter and in the center she writes 710.
The guys behind the counter are looking at it upside down as she writes it…and they just fall down behind the counter laughing so hard in hysterics.
One guy said ” I think you want an oil cap.”
She said, “Seven Ten cap, oil cap, I don’t care what you call it, I just need one, and I don’t see what is so damn funny about it.

Check this out on youtube -   it's a bird (1930)

Had a friend worked at a Chevy dealer motor in van in and out 4 plus timeS and a crate engine turns out it was a bad fuel pump.

Some pretty funny ones.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tBhva55q8pE  

Not really auto humor, but under the heading maybe of "surprising", and along the same lines as the misdiagnosed fuel pump post above, I was at a shop back in the early 90's in Woodbridge NJ where the customer wanted the engine replaced in his mid 85'ish Corvette because he claimed that it was seized.  At some point the shop that he had brought the Corvette to, to do the work, realized that the only problem with the engine was the alternator... (Huh?) 

Turns out the alternator was siezed and the serpentine belt had such a good bite on the alternator pulley that the starter couldn't get the engine to budge at all, so to the owner, it seemed like the engine was siezed.

In 1974 I worked in a Ford Dealership. Customer complant ( a Rattle Noise coming from the seat back.)

Two door car with bench seat, I found a 9" dinner plate in his seat back. LOL

Top reasons why you didn't win the race:

BACK SEAT DRIVER

Karl Freyers sprint car cowl a few years ago 

This drawing was done by Chic's brother in law, Dave Hannah back in 1966.  Scott Ely